Love is Blind – is it?

Love for me has a very broad meaning, and would absolutely depend on a person’s perspective and experience. I had never asked myself nor wondered about what love is, as I have experienced it myself and have seen it among people.  But for some who still wonder and pragmatically questioned yourselves if you were able to experience love; or somehow there is this doubt in yourself whether or not you are under the spell of love or is it something else – perhaps I can help you discover – the true meaning of this rather powerful thing called love and end your obscurity. This is a story of a friend who in her mundane life has met Love but has loosen grip after some time due to underlying irrepressible reasons:

 

I have known Pri for a little over four months now, but I could say that I can feel her profound wretchedness everytime she cries when she spills her disappointment on her love matters with her long-distance boyfriend who, compelled by his lucrative career – had to relocate in China. She would spend hours talking to him online and via phone even in the wee hours of the morning. They have experienced love even before they have seen each other in person; it was about a year ago when they have met online and developed an exigent relationship. She would always cry all day and night because of a terrible fight, they would exchange ruthless words and she would complain about him being so callous at times and would proscribe her from doing things which are favorable to him and basically they would fight about anything big or small. He screams at her and won’t even care on calling or contacting her in any way after their fight or sometimes he would just vanish and would never inform or talk to her and when she asks questions – he scornfully hates it. She bombards us with complaints every single day uttering in brief repugnance how selfish he is and we would ask her – “if that’s the situation, why are you still with him”; and she would mutter “I LOVE HIM.”

 

On the tenth month of their relationship, they have decided to finally meet each other. She flew to Singapore and met him there – spent a week being together and that one week is the happiest and the sweetest moment of her life as she described. He bought her a laptop so she doesn’t have to go to an internet café just to talk to him. The day they have parted, she gave him her gold necklace as a gesture of her love and devotion for him. After their personal meeting and a very memorable week, we have hoped that somehow their relationship will be better. Much to our surprise, it have gotten worst than we could ever imagined. She’s still in tears and one day she told us that they had a very big fight. I remember, she once told me that before leaving Singapore, just by the airport when they were about to take off, he told her “I have to tell you something really important that you deserve to know” and she said “if it’s a reason to end our relationship, then I don’t want to hear it, I’m very happy now and I don’t care about anything we will just have to carry on and move forward”. After a year of having a rollercoaster, bittersweet relationship, turns out he is married. Yes, it is indeed a throbbing news to her and to all of us.

 

Arrange marriages in India are very common, in fact it plays a great role in Indian culture and tradition. He got married when he was 18 to a girl whom was matched to him by his parents. After a few months of staying together, he decided to go to China for a job assignment but the truth is – its not the only reason why he chose to go there. Yes, he wanted to be away, that’s the primary reason why he chose to relocate in China. He abhors his marriage and never communicated with his wife until this day.

 

He wants Pri’s forgiveness, everyday he calls her and he wants to make things right and that’s to spend the rest of his life with her. She is still crying everyday, her heart mourns for him; she said she needs time to assess things. I spoke to her 2 weeks ago and she still doesn’t know what to do. She isn’t mad at him; she doesn’t even feel betrayed of what he has done, rather, she is worried that her parents might come to know about it and they will force her to marry someone else.

 

 Love is blind, as they say, but is love really blind, or is it just us who are blinded because we refuse to see the truth and we only see what we want to see. We would rather endure the pain of hurting ourselves, patiently cry and accept what is there than opening our eyes into reality. The hard truth is we are frightened by the thought of losing someone so regardless of imperfections we still strive to carry on.  We want to do things our way because of what we feel. We ignore what is right or what is wrong; sometimes it doesn’t even matter who wins or who loses just as long as we have LOVE and we stick to it.